That is the greatest gift God has given me.
Forgiveness for all the wrong things I have said, done or thought and all the wrong things I will say do or think in the future. He gave me that gift even though I don't deserve it.
I have accepted God's forgiveness but it is hard to forgive others.
"Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread.
And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil:
For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen."
How can I pray this prayer unless I forgive?
"For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses."
A couple of days ago I saw this video on Mommylife:
I could honestly say the first five of those things about my parents. (Thankfully not the sixth and seventh.) But what about the eighth (final) one? That is very difficult and something I have been struggling with for a long time - particularly since having a child of my own.
I find myself wondering how someone can go from loving their child unconditionally to not? How did things change? Or did they ever love me? Why me? Are they even aware that they treat me differently to my brothers?
I recently read the writings of one blogger who claimed she didn't need to forgive her parents because they need to repent first.
I disagree.
But it still isn't that easy.
I was still thinking and praying about this when I saw a YouTube link posted in the comments on Amanda's recent post.
(A copy of the lyrics can be found here.)
Who am I to withhold forgiveness? I who have been richly blessed with a forgiveness I am unworthy of? Listening to that song reminded me that I have no justification not to forgive (unlike God who is perfect).
Yesterday I still wasn't ready to do so.
But today I did.
I thought I couldn't let go of all the wrongs but that was not true.
"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."
After all, who am I?
I feel such a weight off my heart.
"Rejoice in the Lord alway"
3 comments:
Re: oh I wish I was a SAHM! I just noticed that my words were misleading - I meant to say the list was my average Tuesday. Someday though, the good Lord knows my hearts deepest wishes and I have faith that my time will come!!!
I have forgiven my mother, but it took a very long time. I finally realized that forgiving her is different from condoning what she did. I also realized that I didn't have to tell her I forgive her, or expect her to respond (this would be hard to achieve, since she won't speak to me). It's just something I needed to do in my heart, for myself, so that I could be free.
I know what you mean Heather. My dad doesn't speak to me and I don't think my mum is even aware of having done anything so telling her would just cause trouble.
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"For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O LORD, thou knowest it altogether." ~ Psalm 139:4
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